


Safe

by FanWP



Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Best Friends, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Hurt, Hurt/Comfort, Nightmares, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-26
Updated: 2021-01-26
Packaged: 2021-03-18 12:35:06
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,557
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28992279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FanWP/pseuds/FanWP
Summary: tubbo talk about your feelings challenge!!!!!
Relationships: None, Toby Smith | Tubbo & TommyInnit, thats nasty - Relationship, they are best friends your honor - Relationship
Comments: 2
Kudos: 135





	Safe

Blood. Rocks digging into his side, sword raised feebly in front of him in an useless attempt at protecting himself. He can see Dream’s porcelain mask from the corner of his eye, his axe angled in a sharp swing, a swing which would deal the final blow. He tries to bite his tongue, but his pleas for Dream to leave him alone, to spare him, slip from between his lips anyway. He can hear Tommy, screaming his name, asking if he’s okay-

“-Tubbo? Tubbo?” 

Tubbo can taste iron as he bites his lip harshly, trapping his surprised gasp in his throat. “Tommy?” He pushes himself up slowly, shivering at the chilly evening air. The fire had long gone out, leaving the room lit only by lanterns on his porch and the few torches on the wall still clinging to life. Tommy is standing next to his bed, a blanket wrapped around his shoulders like a cape, and Tubbo can just barely see the tears falling from his eyes. “Tommy? Hey, what’s wrong man?” Tubbo moves over and opens his blanket, cringing from the cold air that sneaks in. Tommy hesitates for a moment, like he regrets waking Tubbo up at all but gets in anyway, letting his blanket fall to the floor. He doesn’t look at Tubbo, sinking down so his head rests against the wall of the small cottage and his back takes up a majority of the pillow. He crosses his arms, sniffling and staring blankly at the fire. 

Tubbo looks at him fondly for a second, a vague scene much like this one floating to the front of his mind. 

_ Tubbo huffs awake, the poking at his side getting too annoying to ignore for much longer. He slowly peels his eyes open and rolls over, expecting Tommy to be trying to wake him up to play or go prank one of his brothers. Tommy is there, but instead of his normal shit-eating grin and bright blue eyes, Tubbo finds tears and trembling lips. “Tommy?” He whispers hoarsely, sitting up and rubbing the sleep from his eyes.  _

_ “Uh-“ Tommy sniffles and looks down, scowling at his feet and wringing his hands nervously. “I just- Uh- Phil had a long day at work, and Wil n’ Techno would get mad at me and I- well I was wondering if- if maybe-“ Tommy purses his lips angrily, narrowing his eyes. “It’s- Nevermind, it’s not important…” Tommy turns to go, wiping his nose with his sleeve, and Tubbo reaches out, grasping the bottom of his shirt between two fingers.  _

_ “Hey-“ Tubbo pauses, biting his lip as Tommy turns back around. His heart tugs at the sight of Tommy’s tears, and the words tumble from his lips before he really thinks them through. “I um, I had a nightmare.” He whispers, feeling a small swell of pride as Tommy’s eyes begin to shine with hope instead of tears. “Would you- would you sleep with me?” Tommy sniffles again, wiping roughly at his face and shaking his head as if he were annoyed, but Tubbo can see the smile tugging at his lips.  _

_ “You big baby,” Tommy scoffs, throwing Tubbo’s covers out of the way and climbing into bed, shuffling down so his head was resting on the pillow. “Guess I’ll stay if it’ll make you feel better, ya clingy bitch.”  _

_ Tubbo laughs softly, laying his head beside Tommy’s and closing his eyes. Tommy’s hand hesitantly finds his under the covers, and Tubbo gives no reaction other than a small squeeze and a gentle smile as he slowly drifts off to sleep.  _

Tubbo settles back onto his side of the bed, bringing the covers up to his chin to warm up. Tommy is still staring blankly into the fire, his jaw clenched tightly and his arms trembling. Tubbo can feel his heart break, watching his best friend fall apart from the corner of his eye, but if he knows anything about Tommy, it’s that you shouldn’t push him. So he makes himself comfortable, watching the embers glow softly in the fireplace. He feels antsy, just sitting there. It leaves his mind free to wander, his imagination free to create scenes that make his toes curl and his body feel even colder, but he does his best to cram it all into the back of his mind. 

“He’s really gone, right?” Tommy’s soft whisper is barely audible, and his voice shakes harshly. 

Tubbo smiles at him, nodding. “Yeah, big man. He’s gone, you’re safe now.” Tubbo reaches out, grabbing his arm reassuringly. Tommy scowls and shakes him off, turning to look at him with a fierce glare that pierces right through him. He feels the urge to shrink in on himself, to flinch back, but he forces himself to keep Tommy’s gaze, pulling his hand back to his lap. 

“It’s not me I’m worried about,” he finally admits, his gaze softening slightly, and Tubbo can see the anger fade into the protective gleam he had witnessed on the mountain and in Dream’s base. It wasn’t something he had seen often, not until they had come to the SMP, until they had figured out how lives work, but he still knew it well. It was usually the last thing he saw before his vision was filled with color and heat was clawing its way through his suit and up his skin, or after Techno’s sword pierced through his back, the sound of his nation, their  _ home _ , becoming nothing more than ashes and debris a mocking melody as he fell to his knees and Tommy found them, his best friends scream of his name the chorus to a symphony never finished. 

Tubbo feels his eyes widen and his lips part in shock, and he furrows his brows in confusion. Why would Tommy be worried about him? Had he noticed Tubbo was having a nightmare? Had he made any noise while he had been asleep that could have altered Tommy? “Me? Why? I’m fine, Tommy!” He forces his lips into a bright smile, shaking his head as if Tommy was just being silly. Tommy scoffs, rolling his eyes. 

“Right, I forgot, Dream  _ didn’t  _ almost kill you the other day,” Tommy laughs bitterly, throwing his still trembling hands into the air. “How silly of me.” Tubbo cringes, breaking eye contact and staring at the blanket, picking at a loose thread. “Fuck- I, I’m sorry, Tubbo. I just- It’s like it doesn’t even bother you! He insulted you and you just- just- let it happen!” 

Silence rings out in the small room, but it’s louder than any explosion or scream. Tubbo wants to speak, he wants to say  _ something _ ,  _ anything _ , but he feels paralyzed- his tongue feels like lead and his mouth can’t seem to form any semblance of a word, opening and closing again and again. He’s too tired, too worn to do anything more than stare down at his hands and try to ignore the feeling of Tommy staring at him. 

“Tubbo- Toby, please. Just- just fucking talk to me man! Have some kind of fucking reaction!”

Tubbo tries, he tries to force a smile, to laugh it off, to push down the surfacing feeling of fear and hurt in his chest- but he feels his resolve smoldering to ashes, any semblance he had left of his walls breaking- why had he invited Tommy to Snowchester, he knew this wasn’t a good idea, stupid, stupid,  _ stupid- _

“Toby?” Blankly he registers Tommy reach up and wipe something off his cheek, and he finally raises his eyes to meet Tommy’s. Tommy is looking at him in shock, his hand frozen between them as he looks back and forth between Tubbo and the teardrop Tommy had caught on his thumb. “You- you’re crying?” Tubbo sniffles, wiping off the tears with the back of his wrist. He barely registers the choked, broken chuckle that leaves his mouth.

“Hah, yeah...yeah I- I guess I am…” His walls come crashing down, and Tommy has his arms wrapped around him before the first sob leaves his mouth, followed by another, and another. He grips Tommy’s shirt tightly in his fist, burying his face into his best friends shoulder, and lets himself cry, lets himself finally feel- and god, he feels so much-

He feels afraid, he feels sad, he feels happy, he feels betrayed and hurt and guilt and shame-

He feels heat curling it’s way up his chest, around his neck like a noose, the sting of betrayal barely there beneath the searing pain and bright, bright colors blinding his vision. 

He feels Sapnap’s sword pierce through his chest, Eret’s dark smile the last thing he sees before everything goes black.

He feels his heart shatter as Tommy’s shaking voice calls out “you’re my friend!” 

As L’manburg loses its final life right in front of his eyes. 

As he stumbles through the nether portal to Logstedshire and finds Tommy’s tower.

He feels- He feels-

Tommy. 

Tommy, who’s holding him tightly, running his fingers through Tubbo’s hair, whispering reassurances into his ear. He can feel Tommy’s own tears fall and hit his shoulder, and his own hold tightens on his best friend. And he realizes that, despite everything else he’s feeling, here, in his dark room, lit only by lanterns and smoldering embers, Tommy by his side, he feels-

Safe.


End file.
